Oh Snap!

That expression makes me laugh. What a throwback!

Here I describe in excruciating detail my epic journey in the quest to get my caravan registered in Swaziland in my name. Until now, it was registered in South Africa under the dealer’s name where I had bought it. When the day finally comes that I need to sell it, I need it in my name.

The outline is probably more for my own records and sense of accomplishment than for your edification. By skimming the lists you’ll get an idea of just how arduous and time consuming an endeavor it was. It counts as much more than a task. Each step was a task, and a monumental patience-builder.

The title and registration process was combined with taking it to a caravan dealer in SA to get some repairs and maintenance done. I was going to have to take it to the border anyway so why not combine the two? This is not a loaded question, by the way, it’s just pointing out practicalities…in a part of the world filled with impracticality.

For the title and registration, I already had the following papers from the dealers:

1.         original title

2.         roadworthiness certificate in SA (valid for only 60 days), so it was expired

3.         change of ownership application

4.         SA registration application

5.         tax invoice (like proof of purchase/receipt but only good for 90 days, so also expired)

In order to get them transferred to my name, I needed:

1.         a special permit to transport the caravan to SA to get the police clearance – E50, only good for 24hrs

2.         a police clearance certificate from SA (valid for 90 days)

3.         a new tax invoice from the dealer in SA (I didn’t know at first)

4.         a customs clearance form for SA –E5 or E150 depending…

5.         a personal tax clearance certificate in Swaziland (SD) saying I don’t owe taxes - good for 30 days

6.         a change of registration form from SD Revenue

7.         an IM8 doc for SD customs clearance – E35

8.         an IM4 doc for SD customs clearance – E35

9.         a customs certificate from SD, proving I had paid the tax on the caravan on the SD side

10.     a police clearance certificate from SD - E50

11.     a roadworthiness certificate from SD - E35 (valid for 21 days)

I began the process in early February, first trying to find out how I get the SA police clearance certificate. Some people, including the police in SD, told me I’d have to go all the way to Joburg, a 5hr drive 1-way. Others told me I could go to a town called Carolina only 1.5hrs away. Finally I ended up visiting the SA police at the border to get to the truth. An officer there told me that, because this should’ve been done so long ago but others failed me (his exact words), they’d provide a letter to the police in Carolina requesting that they issue me the certificate.

So on February 23^rd I went to SD Revenue and got a special permit to transport the caravan (doc 1), then on the 24^th I took it to SA, got the letter at the border, gave it to the police in Carolina along with the other docs, and got the certificate (doc 2). But here were the steps in Carolina:

2.1      go to the police station with your documents

2.2      go to the licensing office on the other end of town and get a form

2.3      take the form back to the police station, have it filled out, the police check the chassis # to  make sure it’s authentic, run the chassis # to make sure it wasn’t stolen, issue you the police clearance

2.4      walk back to the licensing office and give them the form

2.5      Congratulations! You’re finally done with this step…3hrs later

From there, I drove the caravan to the dealer where it stayed for about a month to get things fixed. Meanwhile, I got my tax clearance certificate (doc 5) and the SD registration application form (doc 6).

Once the caravan was fixed the saga continued. I picked it up on March 22^nd and was all set to clear customs at the border. Screeeech! Halt right there! This is when I learned that tax invoices expire after 90 days. What?! Sigh. Ok (head hanging low).

First thing when I got home that night I emailed the dealer in Joburg  where I purchased it and requested a new tax invoice. Once the guy checked that it was legal to do so, he emailed me a scanned copy a week later (doc 3). Because the quality of the image was so grainy, I printed 3-4 copies, trying to improve the quality. This turned out to be fortuitous later.

The next day that I had free to tackle this monster was April 3^rd. The day before I had gone to a place just outside of town to get the SA customs clearance form (doc 4). At the border they wanted to charge me E150 ($20) for the form and to fill it out for me (because you need all sorts of codes and it’s really confusing). Luckily I had a form from way, way back when I first bought the caravan and tried to clear customs. So I just needed the form. They charged me E5 ($0.80) for it. On April 3rd I hitched up the caravan and drove it back to the border just to clear customs (doc 7). You can’t dwell on the irritation or you’ll shorten your life span. Here’s what happened there:

SA side:

7.1      Customs counter guy did the paper work

7.2      Other guy came out and verified chassis # then sent me on my way, “you can go.” Hurray!

SD side:

Chaos – they’ve just instituted Valued Added Tax (VAT) replacing the old sales tax and there are about 75 people at Customs, mostly truck drivers with mile-long lists of cargo waiting since 7AM to finish! OMG!! Yay.

7.3      Main customs desk assigned me a 6 digit number and told me to go to Counter 3 behind me

7.4      Counter 3 lady told me “no, go back to the main counter.”

7.5      While waiting at the main counter I realized my SA police clearance certificate needed one more stamp from the SA police so I walked back across the border with no issues and got the stamp after convincing the cop that 3 SA cops have already verified the chassis #. Trust me! It’s fine! Just gimme the stamp!

7.6      Got back in line in SD, people save your place for you here

7.7      Got the attention of one of the staff and told him I’m just clearing a caravan. He sent me to the Road Tax desk

7.8      Road Tax lady told me to go to Counter 3 to get an IM8 form. “But she told me to go to the main counter!” “Tell her you need an IM8 form.” Ok

7.9      Counter 3 lady sent me to unnumbered counter where I got the form

7.10  Sent back to Counter 3 to pay a fee

7.11  Sent back to main counter again to wait some more

7.12  Finally got to a processing agent and she told me she’d pass me off to her colleague who was away for lunch

7.13  Magically my papers were whisked away and I was again redirected to the road tax lady

7.14  Road tax lady processed my paperwork and sent me on my way

7.15  Congratulations! You’re done with the border, 3.5hrs later…you’re also very annoyed, dehydrated, starving and need a bathroom.

After fuming in the car and eating something, I mustered the strength to martial on with further steps since I still had the whole afternoon! The next step was paying 14% of the value on the SD side. Here was the process:

8.1      First stop was the main Swaziland Revenue Authority (SRA) building.

8.2      Sent to Customs in the Ministry Maze. It really is a maze. I’m not sure why they built it that way. It has all kinds of corridors and dead ends, exits that aren’t really exits, stairways you can’t access, etc

8.3      Sent to Room 42 in the SRA dept

8.4      Sent to Room 21 to get form IM4 (doc 8), my name wasn’t in the system yet.

8.5      Sent to Room 16 to be entered into the system

8.6      Back to Room 21 to get the IM4

9.1      Back to Room 42 to process the paperwork

9.2      To the bank at the shopping plaza to get the rest of the 14% payment

9.3      Back to Room 42

9.4      To the payment counter

9.5      Back to Room 42

9.6      Congratulations! You’ve received your SD customs clearance certificate (doc 9) and it only took 2.5hours!

Since it was the end of the work day I took the caravan back to its temporary resting place to await the next free day to continue the process.

On Thursday, April 5^th I went to Revenue and paid E50 then once again hitched up the caravan and this time hauled it to the Police Service Center. Screeeech! Halt! Don’t you know it’s the day before a 4 day holiday weekend (Good Friday and Easter Monday), so people get off before NOON around here? You can’t do anything today silly, silly girl.

I snapped. Luckily I made it to the car before I snapped. I was enraged. Screaming. Crying with frustration. It was ugly. Once I got it out of my system and accepted the fact that I had hit an impenetrable wall and I would just have to accept my fate that the whole rest of the day nothing would get done, indeed until the following week, I was able to enjoy the rest of a truly beautiful day.

April 10^th I hitched up the caravan for the umpteenth time and took it back to the Police Services Center for doc 10. Here’s what happened this time:

10.1   Handed over my documents

10.2   Told to wait in the hallway

10.3   Went with two cops to the caravan to verify the chassis #

10.4   Back to office to wait for police clearance certificate

10.5   Congratulations! You just tallied another 3hrs to get that piece of paper!

The next stop was the CTA in Matsapha, about 30min away, to get the roadworthiness certificate (doc 11). I don’t even know what CTA stands for, but at least I know where it is. From the tales I’ve heard, it’s a mission just to figure that out! By the way, the cops at the Police Service Center had previously told me I wouldn’t have to do this step, then on the 10^th, they told me I did. You gotta love it.

At the CTA I got a form in duplicate, filled it out, paid a fee, had a guy walk around the caravan and confirm with me orally that the lights and brakes work. He didn’t actually check. Nice. Then I took the papers to an office where I got the roadworthiness certificate. This was all very fast, thankfully, but a huge waste of time and gas to get there and back to Mbabane where all the other stops were.

Last stop: Revenue, again, this time to turn in all my documents, pay a fee, and finally get the new title and registration. I waited in line for over an hour. Joy.

By the time I took all of my documents to Revenue for this step I had 12 documents (+ list of orig docs – a few from new list along the way). This does not include the copies that were made and collected at each step plus the forms I had to fill in, sometimes with 2-3 duplicates, at each step. I’ve definitively determined after this process that Swazis hate trees. They are tree haters. There is no way you can use that much paper and call yourself conservation-minded or a tree-hugger. It was appalling. And never mind the fuel I used or, in some cases, wasted in this whole convoluted process.

To summarize some of the repetition for you, I had to go to:

Revenue 4 times

1.      for the special permit to drive it to SA

2.      to get the registration form

3.      to pay E50 for the police clearance

4.      to pay E220 for the title and registration

the Police Service Center 5 times

1.      to find out how to get the SA police clearance certificate (was misinformed there)

2.      to find out the steps for getting the caravan registered in SD (slightly misinformed again)

3.      to get the SD police clearance (was turned away because it was the day before the Easter weekend)

4.      to find out if they were back to work before hauling my caravan there again for NOTHING (but I’m not bitter)

5.      to get the SD police clearance

the SD/SA Border 4 times

1.      to get definitive information on where to get the SA police clearance certificate

2.      to get the police clearance certificate

3.      to clear customs (learned tax invoice was expired)

4.      to clear customs

While I was doing all this I was also moving from Ezulwini Valley to Pine Valley. In the interim, I house-sat for 3 different people and also spent the night at 2 additional locations, one for work and one while in limbo. So if you combine that with the old and new locations of my own home, between Feb 15 and Apr 17 I stayed in 7 different places. No wonder sometimes I woke up and needed a minute to figure out where I was. No joke! It’s a strange feeling to open your eyes in the morning and expect your surroundings to look totally different than they actually do. But then, those of you who have passed out from a night of inebriation have probably had similar experiences. I think this underscores one reason I don’t drink alcohol. I find other ways to be dazed and confused.

Photojournalism

Originally distributed June 2011

Since I wrote this (below), there was breaking news about the first rhino poached in Swaziland in almost 20 years. Devastating and sad, to say the least. It has been in the papers ever since the incident on June 4^th. I don’t know if it made international news. Chances are it didn’t, which is why I’m notifying you. Luckily suspects have been apprehended and have had their preliminary court hearing. Hopefully, this will let the international organized crime ring behind them know that they can’t get away with this here. Meanwhile, rhino poaching in South Africa has been escalating and 333 rhinos were poached in 2010 alone. That’s almost 1/day! Gruesome photo (you’ve been warned!)

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I’ve uploaded new photos and figured I should provide some commentary to explain some of them. Some, however, I have no explanation for like the various animals that approached the windows to look inside and/or admire their reflections on the same day! Was something in the air?

If you’ve looked at photos already from earlier in the year then you’ve seen a tan Peruvian lady and her French husband, good friends of mine who moved away in May. Until then we enjoyed lots of hikes and other activities, culminating in their farewell party April 30^th. There was another big farewell party in May for several expats, which coincided with Judgment Day. So to celebrate the rapture some friends put together quite an extravaganza.

The wildlife continues to amaze and astound, including a spate of frogs in my house and car, all appearing to be the same species and age (same size). But what has really amazed me and provoked admiration is a juvenile female vervet monkey. I noticed her for the first time in February when she had a grotesquely mangled right arm. It was black and furless from her fingertips to halfway up her upper arm. As I watched her with binoculars, backlit by the afternoon sun, I saw light passing through between her bones. And the mangled part was frozen into position--slightly curled fingers, drooping wrist and a 90* bend in the elbow. She limped about, just keeping up with the rest of the troupe, and understandably appeared to be in pain though her body condition otherwise looked fine.

I wondered about her in the following weeks, puzzling over what caused the injury and what became of her. I figured she probably suffered from a dry snake bite by one of the types that has cytotoxic venom like a puff adder. This dissolved the tissue in the region of the bite. But, being a dry bite, she didn’t get much venom so it didn’t kill her. That’s my hypothesis anyway.

Eventually she resurfaced, this time with three healthy limbs and one stump. But she was getting around fantastically, as if she were born that way. She ran and climbed and kept up with the others with no trouble. I was ebullient. She was alive and well! Since then I’ve seen her too many times to count. Now, thanks to her, I can always recognize her group and I now know that this group hangs out in and around the rest camp where I live. I call her my hero because she survived a terrible injury with no doctors, no antibiotics, no pain killers, and no surgery. The epitome of triumph over tragedy.